1 00:00:09,801 --> 00:00:12,762 [rock music] 2 00:00:12,804 --> 00:00:20,937 * * 3 00:00:44,753 --> 00:00:45,837 (woman on speaker phone) Are you listening to me, Michael? 4 00:00:45,879 --> 00:00:47,380 Affirmative. 5 00:00:47,422 --> 00:00:49,674 What did I just say? 6 00:00:49,716 --> 00:00:52,385 You just said-- Let me, uh... 7 00:00:52,427 --> 00:00:53,470 check my notes. 8 00:00:53,511 --> 00:00:54,971 You just said... 9 00:00:55,013 --> 00:00:57,432 Alan and I have created an incentive program-- 10 00:00:57,474 --> 00:00:59,267 Hey! Hey, how is Alan? 11 00:00:59,309 --> 00:01:03,188 Tell Alan that the Mets suck. Okay? 12 00:01:03,229 --> 00:01:05,774 From me, big time. Go, Pirates! 13 00:01:05,815 --> 00:01:07,275 Not gonna do that, Michael. 14 00:01:07,317 --> 00:01:09,152 We've created an incentive program to increase sales. 15 00:01:09,194 --> 00:01:10,695 Uh-huh. 16 00:01:10,737 --> 00:01:12,072 At the end of the month, you can reward your top seller 17 00:01:12,113 --> 00:01:14,282 with a prize worth up to $1,000. 18 00:01:14,324 --> 00:01:15,784 Whoa, howdy ho. 19 00:01:15,825 --> 00:01:17,369 Wow, 1,000 big ones. That's cool. 20 00:01:17,410 --> 00:01:19,371 Do I, uh, do I get to pick the prize? 21 00:01:19,412 --> 00:01:21,539 Uh...yes. Yes, you can. 22 00:01:21,581 --> 00:01:23,166 Um, question: 23 00:01:23,208 --> 00:01:27,545 Does "top salesman" include people who were at one time 24 00:01:27,587 --> 00:01:31,424 such outstanding salesmen that they've been promoted to-- 25 00:01:31,466 --> 00:01:32,425 No, Michael. 26 00:01:32,467 --> 00:01:34,928 No, you can't win this prize. 27 00:01:34,969 --> 00:01:36,930 I didn't mean me. 28 00:01:47,357 --> 00:01:50,068 Hi. Hi. 29 00:01:50,110 --> 00:01:51,528 Good. I'm Katy. 30 00:01:51,569 --> 00:01:52,821 Hi. Hi. 31 00:01:52,862 --> 00:01:53,947 Nice to meet you. What's your name? 32 00:01:53,988 --> 00:01:55,740 Pam. Hi, nice to meet you, Pam. 33 00:01:55,782 --> 00:01:57,242 Let me ask you a question. 34 00:01:57,283 --> 00:01:59,077 Do you read a lot of fashion magazines? 35 00:01:59,119 --> 00:02:01,121 'Cause you really look fashion-forward, 36 00:02:01,162 --> 00:02:02,997 and I just wanted to let you know-- 37 00:02:03,039 --> 00:02:04,666 Hi, how are you? Hi. 38 00:02:04,708 --> 00:02:06,418 I have a great opportunity today 39 00:02:06,459 --> 00:02:09,754 to get in on some of the newest styles, 40 00:02:09,796 --> 00:02:11,089 'cause I know with your working hours, 41 00:02:11,131 --> 00:02:13,091 you don't really probably have a chance 42 00:02:13,133 --> 00:02:15,093 to go to the mall very often. 43 00:02:15,135 --> 00:02:16,720 So what I have to offer you today 44 00:02:16,761 --> 00:02:19,055 is some excellent purses. 45 00:02:19,097 --> 00:02:21,683 And if I could just have a space to set up, 46 00:02:21,725 --> 00:02:24,477 maybe show you what I have and some of your other, um-- 47 00:02:24,519 --> 00:02:26,771 (Pam) Um... Here, feel that. 48 00:02:26,813 --> 00:02:28,648 Yeah, I--yeah. I really brightens you. 49 00:02:28,690 --> 00:02:30,316 Don't you think that gives her a nice color? 50 00:02:30,358 --> 00:02:31,985 (Angela) Uh, I don't--um... 51 00:02:32,027 --> 00:02:34,612 No, I really-- it really suits you. 52 00:02:34,654 --> 00:02:37,157 Um, I've got faux leather. 53 00:02:37,198 --> 00:02:38,575 I have some really great fakes. 54 00:02:38,616 --> 00:02:40,243 You wouldn't even be able to tell the difference. 55 00:02:40,285 --> 00:02:42,287 Just like all the movie stars-- 56 00:02:42,328 --> 00:02:44,080 I don't wanna interrupt you-- um, sorry. 57 00:02:44,122 --> 00:02:47,292 It--um, we don't usually allow solicitors in the office. 58 00:02:47,334 --> 00:02:50,795 Well, I'm actually selling purses. 59 00:02:50,837 --> 00:02:52,422 Right, I-- no, that's what I mean. 60 00:02:52,464 --> 00:02:54,382 I don't--I can't-- I'm just the receptionist. 61 00:02:54,424 --> 00:02:58,303 I can't authorize you to, like, come in and set up or anything. 62 00:02:58,345 --> 00:03:00,138 Okay, is there somebody that I could talk to? 63 00:03:00,180 --> 00:03:03,308 Like, who would authorize? Is that you? 64 00:03:03,350 --> 00:03:06,478 Well, first, what we have to do 65 00:03:06,519 --> 00:03:09,647 is find out what motivates people more than anything else. 66 00:03:09,689 --> 00:03:10,732 Sex. 67 00:03:10,774 --> 00:03:11,649 It's illegal. I can't do that. 68 00:03:11,691 --> 00:03:12,650 Next best thing. 69 00:03:12,692 --> 00:03:13,651 Torture. 70 00:03:13,693 --> 00:03:14,694 Come on, Dwight. 71 00:03:14,736 --> 00:03:15,653 Just help me out here. 72 00:03:15,695 --> 00:03:16,696 That's stupid. 73 00:03:16,738 --> 00:03:17,655 Um, Michael-- 74 00:03:17,697 --> 00:03:19,032 Pam! 75 00:03:19,074 --> 00:03:20,450 Hey, there's-- Burger with cheese! 76 00:03:20,492 --> 00:03:22,160 There's a person here-- And fries! 77 00:03:22,202 --> 00:03:23,495 There's-- And shake! 78 00:03:23,536 --> 00:03:24,871 What? Go ahead. 79 00:03:24,913 --> 00:03:26,498 There's a person here who wants to sell handbags. 80 00:03:26,539 --> 00:03:28,458 No, no, no. No vendors in the office. 81 00:03:28,500 --> 00:03:29,709 That is a distraction. 82 00:03:29,751 --> 00:03:31,002 Okay, I told her you'd talk to her at least-- 83 00:03:31,044 --> 00:03:32,754 Pam, come on, I'm busy. 84 00:03:32,796 --> 00:03:33,922 So just tell her to go away. 85 00:03:33,963 --> 00:03:35,382 Okay. 86 00:03:36,716 --> 00:03:38,426 [sighs] 87 00:03:41,304 --> 00:03:43,765 All right, I'll talk to her. 88 00:03:43,807 --> 00:03:45,058 This one is hand-embroidered. 89 00:03:45,100 --> 00:03:46,142 All right, girls, break it up. 90 00:03:46,184 --> 00:03:47,727 You're being infiltrated. 91 00:03:47,769 --> 00:03:48,895 Cock in the henhouse. 92 00:03:48,937 --> 00:03:50,730 Cocks in the henhouse. Don't say cocks. 93 00:03:50,772 --> 00:03:52,357 Oh! [clears throat] 94 00:03:52,399 --> 00:03:55,443 [British accent] What is your name, my fair lass? 95 00:03:55,485 --> 00:03:56,361 Katy. 96 00:03:56,403 --> 00:03:59,698 Ah, Katy. Wow, look at you! 97 00:03:59,739 --> 00:04:02,701 You are, uh, you're like the new and improved Pam. 98 00:04:02,742 --> 00:04:04,369 Pam 6.0. 99 00:04:04,411 --> 00:04:06,204 [laughing] Oh, look! 100 00:04:06,246 --> 00:04:08,832 Oh, hey, no cat fights, you two. 101 00:04:08,873 --> 00:04:10,083 I'm against violence in the workplace. 102 00:04:10,125 --> 00:04:11,710 So am I. Nobody cares what you think. 103 00:04:11,751 --> 00:04:12,794 Doesn't matter. 104 00:04:12,836 --> 00:04:14,379 So, uh, you know what? 105 00:04:14,421 --> 00:04:16,673 I usually don't allow solicitors in the office. 106 00:04:16,715 --> 00:04:19,634 But today, I am going to break some rules. 107 00:04:19,676 --> 00:04:21,219 And you can have the conference room. 108 00:04:21,261 --> 00:04:22,387 It's yours, all day. 109 00:04:22,429 --> 00:04:23,555 Wow, thanks. 110 00:04:23,596 --> 00:04:25,306 There's an HR meeting in there at 11:30. 111 00:04:25,348 --> 00:04:28,226 Well, let's put them in the hallway. 112 00:04:28,268 --> 00:04:29,811 We'll give them some chairs. 113 00:04:29,853 --> 00:04:31,521 Right? Decisiveness! 114 00:04:31,563 --> 00:04:33,231 One of the keys to success, 115 00:04:33,273 --> 00:04:35,275 according to Small Businessman. 116 00:04:35,316 --> 00:04:37,235 I do, I read Small Businessman. 117 00:04:37,277 --> 00:04:41,072 I also subscribe to USA Today, 118 00:04:41,114 --> 00:04:44,117 and American Way, um, magazine. 119 00:04:44,159 --> 00:04:45,744 That's the in-flight magazine. 120 00:04:45,785 --> 00:04:47,954 Some great articles in that. 121 00:04:47,996 --> 00:04:52,167 They did this great profile last month 122 00:04:52,208 --> 00:04:54,294 of Doris Roberts, 123 00:04:54,336 --> 00:04:57,547 and where she likes to eat when she's in Phoenix. 124 00:04:57,589 --> 00:04:59,299 Illuminating. 125 00:04:59,341 --> 00:05:00,800 This is my conference room. 126 00:05:00,842 --> 00:05:03,136 So please, uh, make yourself at home. 127 00:05:03,178 --> 00:05:04,304 Whatever you need, 128 00:05:04,346 --> 00:05:06,639 I'm right on the other side of this wall. 129 00:05:06,681 --> 00:05:08,600 Used to be a window here. 130 00:05:08,641 --> 00:05:09,934 There's not anymore. 131 00:05:09,976 --> 00:05:12,354 So that's where I will be. 132 00:05:12,395 --> 00:05:13,980 So... [clears throat] 133 00:05:14,022 --> 00:05:15,273 If you need anything else, 134 00:05:15,315 --> 00:05:16,816 something to make you more comfortable... 135 00:05:16,858 --> 00:05:18,193 Just don't hesitate to ask. 136 00:05:18,234 --> 00:05:20,445 I'm right here. 137 00:05:20,487 --> 00:05:21,404 I'm fine. 138 00:05:21,446 --> 00:05:23,406 Okay. But I'm here. 139 00:05:23,448 --> 00:05:26,451 If you need me. whatever you want. 140 00:05:26,493 --> 00:05:27,911 Nope, nothing. 141 00:05:27,952 --> 00:05:28,953 Come on. Something. 142 00:05:28,995 --> 00:05:30,372 There's something. 143 00:05:30,413 --> 00:05:32,290 Come on! There's something. 144 00:05:32,332 --> 00:05:33,917 I guess a cup of coffee would be great. 145 00:05:33,958 --> 00:05:37,212 Wait a second! 146 00:05:37,253 --> 00:05:40,006 Ah! I should have spotted another addict. 147 00:05:40,048 --> 00:05:41,800 Oh, gotta love the 'Bucks! 148 00:05:41,841 --> 00:05:42,967 What? 149 00:05:43,009 --> 00:05:43,968 It's like a slang for Starbucks. 150 00:05:44,010 --> 00:05:45,637 They're all over the place. 151 00:05:45,679 --> 00:05:49,974 Oh, man, that place is like the promised land to me. 152 00:05:50,016 --> 00:05:52,143 What a business model too. 153 00:05:52,185 --> 00:05:54,062 Oh, too bad we don't have the good stuff here. 154 00:05:54,104 --> 00:05:55,814 Regular coffee is fine. 155 00:05:55,855 --> 00:05:57,524 No, it's not, it's-- 156 00:05:57,565 --> 00:05:58,817 No, really, it is. 157 00:05:58,858 --> 00:06:00,318 No, here's the thing. 158 00:06:00,360 --> 00:06:06,157 You know, I do my best to-- 159 00:06:06,199 --> 00:06:09,327 to be my own man, and, uh... 160 00:06:09,369 --> 00:06:11,996 go by the beat of a different drummer. 161 00:06:12,038 --> 00:06:13,707 And nobody gets me. 162 00:06:13,748 --> 00:06:15,291 And they're always putting up walls, 163 00:06:15,333 --> 00:06:16,710 and I'm always tearing them down. 164 00:06:16,751 --> 00:06:20,296 Just breaking down barriers. That's what I do all day. 165 00:06:23,258 --> 00:06:25,719 So...a coffee. 166 00:06:25,760 --> 00:06:28,013 Regular coffee. For you. 167 00:06:28,054 --> 00:06:30,849 High test or unleaded? 168 00:06:30,890 --> 00:06:32,017 Bring it on. 169 00:06:32,058 --> 00:06:33,643 Ooh, ho! Whoo! 170 00:06:33,685 --> 00:06:35,812 I will, I'll bring it on! All right! 171 00:06:35,854 --> 00:06:37,022 You know, you don't wanna say, 172 00:06:37,063 --> 00:06:40,984 "Oh, people find me charming," but... 173 00:06:41,026 --> 00:06:44,029 because that's probably not charming to say that. 174 00:06:44,070 --> 00:06:47,407 But I think people do. 175 00:06:49,367 --> 00:06:52,203 So...are you jealous 176 00:06:52,245 --> 00:06:54,080 'cause there's another girl around? 177 00:06:54,122 --> 00:06:56,583 No. 178 00:06:56,624 --> 00:06:59,419 She's prettier than you, though. 179 00:07:02,255 --> 00:07:05,467 That's a very rude thing to say, Kevin. 180 00:07:09,220 --> 00:07:11,598 (Kelly) Here's the thing what Travers does that in his last job, 181 00:07:11,639 --> 00:07:13,516 he made twice that I think we can offer. 182 00:07:13,558 --> 00:07:15,101 [shouts] 183 00:07:15,143 --> 00:07:16,853 Can I see that? Yeah. 184 00:07:16,895 --> 00:07:18,813 Okay, [indistinct]. 185 00:07:20,106 --> 00:07:22,942 You know, when Sanderson came in, 186 00:07:22,984 --> 00:07:24,903 he mentioned his old boss, 187 00:07:24,944 --> 00:07:25,987 and I thought he sounded like 188 00:07:26,029 --> 00:07:27,113 he might have some recommendations. 189 00:07:27,155 --> 00:07:28,531 So you-- 190 00:07:28,573 --> 00:07:30,742 I see you like the periwinkles and the purples. 191 00:07:31,868 --> 00:07:35,288 Looks local, but hot local. 192 00:07:35,330 --> 00:07:37,665 [scoffs] You kidding? 193 00:07:37,707 --> 00:07:40,335 If she was local, I would've had her a long time ago. 194 00:07:40,377 --> 00:07:42,754 I think she's foreign-born. 195 00:07:42,796 --> 00:07:45,548 [indistinct chatter] 196 00:07:45,590 --> 00:07:47,008 Really? 197 00:07:47,050 --> 00:07:50,095 Yeah. You see those calves? 198 00:07:50,136 --> 00:07:51,429 Sinewy. 199 00:07:51,471 --> 00:07:54,808 Definitely western European stock. 200 00:07:54,849 --> 00:07:57,727 The purse girl hits everything on my checklist. 201 00:07:57,769 --> 00:08:00,980 Creamy skin, straight teeth, 202 00:08:01,022 --> 00:08:04,484 curly hair, amazing breasts-- 203 00:08:04,526 --> 00:08:06,444 not for me, for my children. 204 00:08:06,486 --> 00:08:09,698 The Schrutes produce very thirsty babies. 205 00:08:18,665 --> 00:08:20,291 This is really well made. 206 00:08:20,333 --> 00:08:22,669 Good stitching. Excellent fabric. 207 00:08:25,088 --> 00:08:26,297 You sell a lot of these? 208 00:08:26,339 --> 00:08:28,299 It's very popular, yeah. 209 00:08:28,341 --> 00:08:30,468 I knew it. Is it waterproof? 210 00:08:30,510 --> 00:08:32,887 I'm not sure. It's faux snakeskin. 211 00:08:32,929 --> 00:08:34,472 Snakes are waterproof, 212 00:08:34,514 --> 00:08:37,392 so I'm betting that it's waterproof. 213 00:08:37,434 --> 00:08:39,227 Do you know the difference between a snake and an eel? 214 00:08:39,269 --> 00:08:40,478 No. 215 00:08:40,520 --> 00:08:42,188 'Cause I could look it up really easily. 216 00:08:42,230 --> 00:08:43,898 You're really into reptiles, huh? 217 00:08:43,940 --> 00:08:47,485 My belt is made out of alligator, check it out. 218 00:08:47,527 --> 00:08:49,738 Oh, um, it's okay. Dwight, Dwight! 219 00:08:49,779 --> 00:08:51,823 Okay, that's it. Keep it in your pants. 220 00:08:51,865 --> 00:08:54,409 I was just showing her my belt. Well, don't do that. 221 00:08:54,451 --> 00:08:56,036 Where are your glasses? I-- 222 00:08:56,077 --> 00:08:57,287 He wears glasses. Did you know that? 223 00:08:57,328 --> 00:08:58,580 Not all the time. 224 00:08:58,621 --> 00:09:00,165 Well, now, suddenly he can see. 225 00:09:00,206 --> 00:09:02,000 [laughs] Okay, take off. 226 00:09:02,042 --> 00:09:03,960 See ya. Bye-bye. 227 00:09:04,002 --> 00:09:05,045 There you go! 228 00:09:05,086 --> 00:09:06,671 Nice, steaming hot cup of joe. 229 00:09:06,713 --> 00:09:09,382 Thank you. Oh, I know. Your hero. 230 00:09:09,424 --> 00:09:11,634 Yeah, saving you from Animal Planet Jack over there. 231 00:09:11,676 --> 00:09:12,635 [both laugh] 232 00:09:12,677 --> 00:09:14,596 He asks a lot of questions. 233 00:09:14,637 --> 00:09:16,181 Yeah, yeah, he is the worst. 234 00:09:16,222 --> 00:09:18,016 Um, I have an idea. 235 00:09:18,058 --> 00:09:19,601 Why don't I introduce you around? 236 00:09:19,642 --> 00:09:21,644 You know, you can kind of get your foot in the door, 237 00:09:21,686 --> 00:09:23,646 meet potential clientele, right? 238 00:09:23,688 --> 00:09:25,648 Gosh, I'm-- I would love to, 239 00:09:25,690 --> 00:09:27,692 but my purses, I should, um-- 240 00:09:27,734 --> 00:09:29,861 Oh, um, well, we can have Ryan take a look. 241 00:09:29,903 --> 00:09:31,696 Ryan, would you look after the purses, please? 242 00:09:31,738 --> 00:09:33,531 Uh, I'm installing file share on all the computers. 243 00:09:33,573 --> 00:09:35,158 Yeah, well, blah dee blooh dah blah blah. 244 00:09:35,200 --> 00:09:36,493 Techno babble. 245 00:09:36,534 --> 00:09:38,370 Just do it, okay? We have company, right? 246 00:09:38,411 --> 00:09:40,747 Here we go. 247 00:09:40,789 --> 00:09:42,457 Thank you. 248 00:09:43,833 --> 00:09:47,420 The perfect girl for me would be Konikotaka. 249 00:09:47,462 --> 00:09:49,297 She has the most amazing story. 250 00:09:49,339 --> 00:09:50,715 She was orphaned at the age of ten 251 00:09:50,757 --> 00:09:52,384 when both her parents were assassinated, 252 00:09:52,425 --> 00:09:53,802 and she was taken in by a wealthy 253 00:09:53,843 --> 00:09:55,970 but very cruel businessman, 254 00:09:56,012 --> 00:09:58,682 so she practiced aikido in secret for years 255 00:09:58,723 --> 00:10:01,434 until she could avenge the death of her parents. 256 00:10:02,727 --> 00:10:04,020 You should sell a lot here, 257 00:10:04,062 --> 00:10:07,190 because this branch made over $1 million last year. 258 00:10:07,232 --> 00:10:08,525 Not that we're all millionaires. 259 00:10:08,566 --> 00:10:10,610 I'm probably closest, so... 260 00:10:10,652 --> 00:10:13,321 Here's Oscar! Oscar, this is Katy. 261 00:10:13,363 --> 00:10:14,406 I'm on the phone. 262 00:10:14,447 --> 00:10:16,449 Ooh, ooh, oh, Oscar the Grouch. 263 00:10:16,491 --> 00:10:18,410 Right? I thought of that. 264 00:10:18,451 --> 00:10:19,911 That was on Sesame Street. 265 00:10:19,953 --> 00:10:21,329 I know, I know, I know. 266 00:10:21,371 --> 00:10:22,580 I made the connection. 267 00:10:22,622 --> 00:10:23,915 Can you believe he'd never heard that 268 00:10:23,957 --> 00:10:25,417 before he worked here? 269 00:10:25,458 --> 00:10:26,793 No, I don't believe that. 270 00:10:26,835 --> 00:10:28,503 I know, it's unbelievable. 271 00:10:28,545 --> 00:10:30,964 It's nice having Katy around. 272 00:10:31,006 --> 00:10:35,260 It's another person for Michael to, um... 273 00:10:35,301 --> 00:10:37,595 interact with. 274 00:10:40,140 --> 00:10:42,642 I mean, whatever one you want. 275 00:10:42,684 --> 00:10:44,227 Um, I like that one, I think. 276 00:10:44,269 --> 00:10:46,604 Okay. 277 00:10:47,355 --> 00:10:49,607 Yeah, I mean, it looks really good, probably-- 278 00:10:49,649 --> 00:10:53,153 Thank you, Al Gore for the Internet. 279 00:10:53,194 --> 00:10:56,281 You can send messages from one side of the globe 280 00:10:56,322 --> 00:10:57,824 to the other in the blink of an eye. 281 00:10:57,866 --> 00:10:59,701 Can you believe we couldn't do that ten years ago? 282 00:10:59,743 --> 00:11:01,327 We could do that ten years ago. 283 00:11:01,369 --> 00:11:04,456 Right, but 20 years ago we couldn't, and that is amazing. 284 00:11:04,497 --> 00:11:06,416 Here is Toby from Human Resources. 285 00:11:06,458 --> 00:11:08,585 Katy, Toby. 286 00:11:08,626 --> 00:11:09,961 Toby, Katy! Hi, nice to meet you. 287 00:11:10,003 --> 00:11:12,547 Did you go to Bishop O'Hara? 288 00:11:12,589 --> 00:11:14,257 Yeah. Yeah, me too. 289 00:11:14,299 --> 00:11:15,467 Cool. What year were you there? 290 00:11:15,508 --> 00:11:16,968 '89. Toby's divorced. 291 00:11:17,010 --> 00:11:18,887 He, uh...God. 292 00:11:18,928 --> 00:11:20,347 Recently, right? 293 00:11:20,388 --> 00:11:21,723 Yeah. You and your wife? 294 00:11:21,765 --> 00:11:23,308 And you have kids? A girl. 295 00:11:23,350 --> 00:11:24,684 Oh, that's so... 296 00:11:24,726 --> 00:11:26,686 That was really messy. 297 00:11:26,728 --> 00:11:30,523 You slept one night in your car too? 298 00:11:30,565 --> 00:11:32,025 I should probably 299 00:11:32,067 --> 00:11:33,151 get back to my table. 300 00:11:33,193 --> 00:11:34,486 Okay, all right. 301 00:11:34,527 --> 00:11:36,863 Cool. See you in a bit. 302 00:11:39,157 --> 00:11:41,534 Oh! Hey, she's cute. 303 00:11:41,576 --> 00:11:44,329 Cutie pie. Back to work! 304 00:11:44,371 --> 00:11:46,331 I live by one rule. 305 00:11:46,373 --> 00:11:48,625 No office romances, no way. 306 00:11:48,667 --> 00:11:51,920 Very messy, inappropriate. 307 00:11:51,961 --> 00:11:53,296 No. 308 00:11:53,338 --> 00:11:54,756 But... 309 00:11:54,798 --> 00:11:57,258 I live by another rule. 310 00:11:57,300 --> 00:11:59,469 Just do it. Nike. 311 00:12:03,390 --> 00:12:04,349 Hey, Jimmy, what do you think 312 00:12:04,391 --> 00:12:05,517 about that little purse girl, huh? 313 00:12:05,558 --> 00:12:07,686 Cute, sure, yeah. 314 00:12:07,727 --> 00:12:09,229 Why don't you get on that? 315 00:12:09,270 --> 00:12:11,231 She's not really my type. 316 00:12:11,272 --> 00:12:12,691 What, are you gay? 317 00:12:12,732 --> 00:12:15,402 Mmm, I don't think so, no. 318 00:12:15,443 --> 00:12:17,779 (Kevin) Well, what is your type? 319 00:12:19,447 --> 00:12:21,741 Moms...primarily. 320 00:12:21,783 --> 00:12:24,452 Yep, soccer moms, single moms, NASCAR moms. 321 00:12:24,494 --> 00:12:26,079 Any type of mom, really. 322 00:12:26,121 --> 00:12:27,497 That's disgusting. 323 00:12:27,539 --> 00:12:28,623 (Kevin) Stay away from my mom. 324 00:12:28,665 --> 00:12:30,625 Too late, Kev. 325 00:12:34,004 --> 00:12:35,964 Oh. 326 00:12:36,006 --> 00:12:38,675 Man, I would be all over that if I wasn't dating Pam. 327 00:12:39,968 --> 00:12:43,096 We're not dating, we're engaged. 328 00:12:43,138 --> 00:12:45,473 Engaged, yeah. 329 00:12:58,528 --> 00:13:00,530 (Jim) Pam and I are good buddies. 330 00:13:00,572 --> 00:13:01,698 I'm sort of Pam's go-to guy 331 00:13:01,740 --> 00:13:03,616 for her problems. 332 00:13:03,658 --> 00:13:05,702 You know, with stuff like work 333 00:13:05,744 --> 00:13:08,413 or, uh, her fiancé Roy. 334 00:13:08,455 --> 00:13:10,915 Or, um... 335 00:13:10,957 --> 00:13:13,835 Nope, those are pretty much her only two problems. 336 00:13:14,794 --> 00:13:16,171 (Jim) She'd be perfect for you. 337 00:13:16,212 --> 00:13:17,172 (Dwight) Mmm. 338 00:13:17,213 --> 00:13:19,257 She's been talking to Michael a lot. 339 00:13:19,299 --> 00:13:20,633 So what? 340 00:13:20,675 --> 00:13:22,052 You're Assistant Regional Manager. 341 00:13:22,093 --> 00:13:23,636 Assistant to the Regional Manager. 342 00:13:23,678 --> 00:13:24,637 Well, you know what, Dwight? 343 00:13:24,679 --> 00:13:26,139 He's your work boss, okay? 344 00:13:26,181 --> 00:13:27,599 He is not your relationship boss. 345 00:13:27,640 --> 00:13:28,683 That's true. 346 00:13:28,725 --> 00:13:29,976 Plus, you have so much more 347 00:13:30,018 --> 00:13:32,187 to talk to this girl about. 348 00:13:32,228 --> 00:13:35,398 You're both, um, salesmen. 349 00:13:35,440 --> 00:13:36,775 I mean, that's something right there. 350 00:13:36,816 --> 00:13:37,692 True. 351 00:13:37,734 --> 00:13:39,319 Plus, I could talk to her 352 00:13:39,361 --> 00:13:42,030 about the origins of my last name. 353 00:13:42,072 --> 00:13:44,074 It's all gold. 354 00:13:45,700 --> 00:13:46,826 Guys are usually my best customers. 355 00:13:46,868 --> 00:13:48,286 They buy the high-end stuff, 356 00:13:48,328 --> 00:13:50,538 like the beads and the sequins and stuff, 357 00:13:50,580 --> 00:13:52,499 for gifts, you know. 358 00:13:52,540 --> 00:13:53,667 They don't know what they're looking at, 359 00:13:53,708 --> 00:13:55,919 so I make suggestions. 360 00:13:55,960 --> 00:13:57,629 All right, here's the thing, okay? 361 00:13:57,671 --> 00:13:59,130 You just keep talking to her. 362 00:13:59,172 --> 00:14:00,840 If you hit a stall, you have a perfect fallback. 363 00:14:00,882 --> 00:14:02,759 What's that? You buy a purse. 364 00:14:02,801 --> 00:14:04,427 I don't want a purse. Purses are for girls. 365 00:14:04,469 --> 00:14:05,762 Dwight, that's not necessarily true. 366 00:14:05,804 --> 00:14:07,305 Do you read GQ? 367 00:14:07,347 --> 00:14:08,723 No. Okay, I do. 368 00:14:08,765 --> 00:14:10,392 They're like mini briefcases, all right? 369 00:14:10,433 --> 00:14:12,143 Lots of guys have them. 370 00:14:12,185 --> 00:14:13,728 Like those? Yes! 371 00:14:13,770 --> 00:14:15,855 Listen, you are spending way too much time 372 00:14:15,897 --> 00:14:17,691 talking to me when you could be talking to her. 373 00:14:17,732 --> 00:14:18,900 Okay, I'm just gonna use the bathroom and then-- 374 00:14:18,942 --> 00:14:20,527 No, you don't need the bathroom. 375 00:14:20,568 --> 00:14:22,779 You've got it. Go. 376 00:14:25,490 --> 00:14:27,117 [whispering] Okay, shh. Stop. 377 00:14:27,158 --> 00:14:28,451 Stop whatever you're doing, 378 00:14:28,493 --> 00:14:31,413 'cause this is going to be good. 379 00:14:31,454 --> 00:14:33,373 (Jim) [high voice mimicking] Hi, my name is Dwight Schrute, 380 00:14:33,415 --> 00:14:35,625 and I would like to buy a purse from you. 381 00:14:35,667 --> 00:14:37,877 Good Lord, look at these purses! 382 00:14:37,919 --> 00:14:40,046 This is something special. 383 00:14:40,088 --> 00:14:45,552 Oh, my God, is this Salvatore Dacinni purse? 384 00:14:45,593 --> 00:14:48,304 Oh, definitely--definitely step in and out of it like that. 385 00:14:48,346 --> 00:14:50,724 (Jim) Yes, well, I want to stress test it. 386 00:14:50,765 --> 00:14:51,850 You know, 387 00:14:51,891 --> 00:14:53,393 in case anything happens. 388 00:14:53,435 --> 00:14:54,936 Oh! Oh! 389 00:14:54,978 --> 00:14:57,939 [laughing] That was really-- 390 00:14:57,981 --> 00:14:59,649 This is necessary to do 391 00:14:59,691 --> 00:15:01,317 to really give it a good workout. 392 00:15:01,359 --> 00:15:03,236 This is the--ooh. 393 00:15:03,278 --> 00:15:05,947 This is the prettiest one of all. 394 00:15:05,989 --> 00:15:08,575 I'm gonna be the prettiest girl in the ball. 395 00:15:08,616 --> 00:15:09,784 Oh, how much? 396 00:15:09,826 --> 00:15:11,995 Oh, God, it's sad. 397 00:15:12,037 --> 00:15:13,288 It's so sad. 398 00:15:13,329 --> 00:15:15,582 It is sad. Oh. 399 00:15:15,623 --> 00:15:17,375 You know, Michael's been talking to her too. 400 00:15:17,417 --> 00:15:18,460 Oh, really? 401 00:15:18,501 --> 00:15:19,711 What do you think his chances are? 402 00:15:19,753 --> 00:15:21,671 Well, Pam, I'm not gonna lie to you. 403 00:15:21,713 --> 00:15:24,883 His chances are none. 404 00:15:24,924 --> 00:15:26,885 Um, he's 41 years old. 405 00:15:26,926 --> 00:15:29,262 He is losing his hair. 406 00:15:29,304 --> 00:15:33,850 And his cell phone ring is "Mambo No. 5.," so... 407 00:15:33,892 --> 00:15:35,727 (Pam) I like that song. 408 00:15:35,769 --> 00:15:37,729 I don't know, though. I mean, you know-- 409 00:15:37,771 --> 00:15:40,482 that was a hit, you know? 410 00:15:40,523 --> 00:15:42,275 Ten years ago. 411 00:15:42,317 --> 00:15:43,860 Yeah, was it ten? 412 00:15:43,902 --> 00:15:47,030 Yeah, I have it on a mixtape from junior high. 413 00:15:47,072 --> 00:15:48,156 Oh. 414 00:15:54,746 --> 00:15:56,748 [giggling] 415 00:15:56,790 --> 00:15:58,124 He did pick a good one. 416 00:15:58,166 --> 00:15:59,167 You're horrible. 417 00:15:59,209 --> 00:16:01,336 This one's really good for a hot date. 418 00:16:01,378 --> 00:16:02,379 Yeah, what's that? 419 00:16:02,420 --> 00:16:03,421 [both laugh] 420 00:16:03,463 --> 00:16:04,506 I'm engaged. 421 00:16:04,547 --> 00:16:05,632 Oh, congratulations. 422 00:16:05,674 --> 00:16:06,800 You need a hot date more than anyone. 423 00:16:06,841 --> 00:16:08,301 Oh, I wish, right? 424 00:16:08,343 --> 00:16:10,512 Giggle, giggle, shooshy, shooshy. 425 00:16:10,553 --> 00:16:12,013 I get it, I get it. 426 00:16:12,055 --> 00:16:14,474 Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhoodover here. 427 00:16:14,516 --> 00:16:15,725 Right? 428 00:16:15,767 --> 00:16:18,645 So, how was that coffee from earlier? 429 00:16:18,687 --> 00:16:19,813 It was good. 430 00:16:19,854 --> 00:16:21,564 Ah, I knew it. 431 00:16:21,606 --> 00:16:24,818 Guzzled it down. You greedy little thing. 432 00:16:24,859 --> 00:16:27,487 So, uh, Pam, is this your lunch break 433 00:16:27,529 --> 00:16:29,322 or was that earlier, 434 00:16:29,364 --> 00:16:32,450 when you were eating in the kitchen with those guys? 435 00:16:34,536 --> 00:16:36,121 [gasps] Sorry. 436 00:16:36,162 --> 00:16:37,455 Busted. 437 00:16:37,497 --> 00:16:38,665 [laughs] 438 00:16:38,707 --> 00:16:39,833 Come back? Oh, hey! 439 00:16:39,874 --> 00:16:41,167 I wanna show you something. 440 00:16:41,209 --> 00:16:42,711 Come here. I wanna show you something. 441 00:16:42,752 --> 00:16:44,379 I know you are gonna like this. 442 00:16:44,421 --> 00:16:46,506 Picked it up today. 1,000 big ones. 443 00:16:46,548 --> 00:16:47,841 Is that from Starbucks? 444 00:16:47,882 --> 00:16:50,802 Yes, this is a Starbucks Digital Barista. 445 00:16:50,844 --> 00:16:53,138 This is the mack daddy of espresso makers. 446 00:16:53,179 --> 00:16:55,056 Wow, is that for the office? 447 00:16:55,098 --> 00:16:56,766 Oh, I know what you're thinking. 448 00:16:56,808 --> 00:16:58,476 Ooh, you're not prying this out of my hands. 449 00:16:58,518 --> 00:17:00,186 [laughs] 450 00:17:00,228 --> 00:17:01,813 But don't tempt me, 'cause I'll give it to you. 451 00:17:01,855 --> 00:17:04,107 I wouldn't think of it. 452 00:17:04,149 --> 00:17:07,193 Coffee is the great "incentivizer" in the office. 453 00:17:07,235 --> 00:17:09,946 It's a drug-- it is quite literally a drug 454 00:17:09,988 --> 00:17:12,198 that speeds people up. 455 00:17:12,240 --> 00:17:14,367 It's not the only drug that speeds people up. 456 00:17:14,409 --> 00:17:18,163 You hear stories about Dunder Mifflin in the '80s 457 00:17:18,204 --> 00:17:20,999 before everybody knew how bad cocaine was. 458 00:17:21,041 --> 00:17:23,460 Gah--man, did they move paper! 459 00:17:23,501 --> 00:17:28,923 Oh, the rotating, uh, steam...wand. 460 00:17:29,966 --> 00:17:31,718 What? What's the matter? 461 00:17:31,760 --> 00:17:34,471 Oh, nothing. My ride just bailed on me. 462 00:17:34,512 --> 00:17:36,598 Oh, oh, God, I'm sorry. 463 00:17:36,639 --> 00:17:37,766 Is it-- Oh, no, it's-- 464 00:17:37,807 --> 00:17:39,017 Where you going? Nearby? 465 00:17:39,059 --> 00:17:40,101 Because I could give you a ride. 466 00:17:40,143 --> 00:17:41,644 No. Sure? 467 00:17:41,686 --> 00:17:43,813 I don't wanna inconvenience you. 468 00:17:43,855 --> 00:17:45,357 No, no, no, no, no! No inconvenience. 469 00:17:45,398 --> 00:17:47,150 I mean, I'm out of here at 5:00 sharp. 470 00:17:47,192 --> 00:17:49,361 At 5:00? I can go earlier, 'cause I'm the boss. 471 00:17:49,402 --> 00:17:53,323 You know, whatever. I'm outta here...slaves. Okay. 472 00:17:53,365 --> 00:17:54,407 What? 473 00:17:54,449 --> 00:17:56,868 Okay. Okay! 474 00:17:56,910 --> 00:17:59,037 I guess that would be-- I guess that would be okay. 475 00:17:59,079 --> 00:18:01,081 Okay, sounds good, sounds good. 476 00:18:01,122 --> 00:18:04,000 5:00 sharp, I will give you and your purses a ride home. 477 00:18:04,042 --> 00:18:05,585 Okay, cool. Excellent. 478 00:18:05,627 --> 00:18:06,586 Right! Great! 479 00:18:06,628 --> 00:18:07,587 Cool. Cool! 480 00:18:07,629 --> 00:18:09,547 Cool! 481 00:18:12,634 --> 00:18:13,885 Nyah, okay. 482 00:18:13,927 --> 00:18:15,387 Why do women find Michael Scott attractive? 483 00:18:15,428 --> 00:18:17,097 Why do women appeal to Michael Scott? 484 00:18:17,138 --> 00:18:20,684 Um, I guess because I'm an authority figure. 485 00:18:20,725 --> 00:18:22,811 Because I have a lot of power. 486 00:18:22,852 --> 00:18:24,646 Women are attracted to that. 487 00:18:24,688 --> 00:18:25,939 That's appealing to women. 488 00:18:25,980 --> 00:18:27,857 Um, I think I'm a little bit of a bad boy. 489 00:18:27,899 --> 00:18:29,317 There's a little mystery to me. 490 00:18:29,359 --> 00:18:31,569 I don't just lay it all out there, I think. 491 00:18:31,611 --> 00:18:33,947 Um, you know, you have to hold something back. 492 00:18:33,988 --> 00:18:36,783 Um, I don't think I'm too shabby to look at. 493 00:18:36,825 --> 00:18:40,286 Um, I wouldn't kick me out of bed for eating crackers. 494 00:18:40,328 --> 00:18:46,001 Um, but I guess--I think my comedy really is the-- 495 00:18:46,042 --> 00:18:48,128 is the topper, um... 496 00:18:48,169 --> 00:18:49,587 That's the way to get in, you know? 497 00:18:49,629 --> 00:18:53,133 I think that's really what's-- What's the saying? 498 00:18:53,174 --> 00:18:54,968 "Once they're laughing, they're--that's--" 499 00:18:55,010 --> 00:18:57,137 Once they're laughing, that 50% of them 500 00:18:57,178 --> 00:18:59,472 being horizontal? So... 501 00:18:59,514 --> 00:19:01,182 Not that--I'm just-- 502 00:19:01,224 --> 00:19:04,269 Not that that's my-- that's what I'm trying to do, 503 00:19:04,310 --> 00:19:07,480 but I think it helps, kind of melts the ice. 504 00:19:07,522 --> 00:19:09,149 Breaks the ice--melts. 505 00:19:09,190 --> 00:19:11,359 Breaks the ice and melts them. Melts their hearts. 506 00:19:18,450 --> 00:19:20,410 Went well? 507 00:19:22,078 --> 00:19:25,290 I think it did. 508 00:19:25,331 --> 00:19:27,208 You know what? Just in case she's looking, 509 00:19:27,250 --> 00:19:29,711 you should put some stuff in there. 510 00:19:29,753 --> 00:19:32,464 Seriously? 511 00:19:32,505 --> 00:19:34,591 Anything. 512 00:19:36,426 --> 00:19:38,345 Good. 513 00:19:39,262 --> 00:19:41,056 Yup. 514 00:19:41,097 --> 00:19:43,183 Oh, Post-it notes. 515 00:19:43,224 --> 00:19:44,726 Wow, the purse holds a lot. 516 00:19:44,768 --> 00:19:45,810 It's a mini briefcase. 517 00:19:45,852 --> 00:19:46,936 Yeah. Oh, I know. 518 00:19:46,978 --> 00:19:48,730 Looks great. 519 00:19:48,772 --> 00:19:50,940 [clears throat] 520 00:19:57,113 --> 00:19:59,491 Do you like Steve Miller? No. 521 00:19:59,532 --> 00:20:02,869 'Cause I'm in a Steve Miller tribute-- 522 00:20:02,911 --> 00:20:05,038 tribute band. 523 00:20:05,830 --> 00:20:07,957 I should never have let the temp touch this thing. 524 00:20:07,999 --> 00:20:09,459 I had all these great icons, 525 00:20:09,501 --> 00:20:12,253 and now I have four folders, so... 526 00:20:12,295 --> 00:20:13,421 It's actually better this way. 527 00:20:13,463 --> 00:20:15,131 No, it's not, because I could just 528 00:20:15,173 --> 00:20:17,092 click on the icon and then I'm onto something-- 529 00:20:17,133 --> 00:20:18,718 Michael, could I ask you something? 530 00:20:18,760 --> 00:20:21,680 I wanted to ask your permission to ask out Katy. 531 00:20:21,721 --> 00:20:23,264 I know it's against the rules and everything-- 532 00:20:23,306 --> 00:20:24,933 No, no, no, it's not against the rules. 533 00:20:24,974 --> 00:20:26,059 [clears throat] 534 00:20:26,101 --> 00:20:27,435 She is not a permanent employee, 535 00:20:27,477 --> 00:20:28,645 so it's not. 536 00:20:28,687 --> 00:20:30,313 Thank you, Michael. I appreciate this so much. 537 00:20:30,355 --> 00:20:31,731 But I think you should just know 538 00:20:31,773 --> 00:20:35,485 that I am going to be giving her a ride home later. 539 00:20:35,527 --> 00:20:37,070 What? 540 00:20:37,112 --> 00:20:38,279 She asked me for a ride, 541 00:20:38,321 --> 00:20:40,907 and so I'm going to give her a ride home. 542 00:20:40,949 --> 00:20:42,450 Is that all it is? 543 00:20:42,492 --> 00:20:43,618 Just a ride home? 544 00:20:43,660 --> 00:20:45,120 Like a taxi cab? 545 00:20:45,161 --> 00:20:47,914 Well, it might be a ride home. 546 00:20:47,956 --> 00:20:52,627 Might be a ride home, and we stop for coffee and... 547 00:20:52,669 --> 00:20:54,379 dot, dot, dot. 548 00:20:57,090 --> 00:20:59,092 Please...please... 549 00:20:59,134 --> 00:21:00,427 I am your inferior, 550 00:21:00,468 --> 00:21:02,470 and I'm asking you this favor. 551 00:21:02,512 --> 00:21:05,432 Can you promise me that it will just be a ride home? 552 00:21:09,769 --> 00:21:11,604 No. I cannot promise. 553 00:21:11,646 --> 00:21:13,732 You cannot promise me, or you won't promise me? 554 00:21:13,773 --> 00:21:15,775 Listen, Dwight-- 555 00:21:15,817 --> 00:21:16,985 Do you love her? 556 00:21:17,027 --> 00:21:18,069 [scoffs] Dwight, no. 557 00:21:18,111 --> 00:21:20,739 I--I don't know. 558 00:21:20,780 --> 00:21:22,198 It's too early to tell. 559 00:21:22,240 --> 00:21:25,368 I--I don't know how I feel. 560 00:21:30,665 --> 00:21:32,042 I think you've made a really good choice. 561 00:21:32,083 --> 00:21:33,126 She's really gonna like that. 562 00:21:33,168 --> 00:21:35,003 Hmm. Espresso? 563 00:21:35,045 --> 00:21:36,087 Oh, thank you. 564 00:21:36,129 --> 00:21:37,672 You're welcome. 565 00:21:37,714 --> 00:21:38,840 Thank you. 566 00:21:38,882 --> 00:21:39,924 Mmm, mmm, mmm. 567 00:21:39,966 --> 00:21:41,259 Mmm! 568 00:21:41,301 --> 00:21:43,595 Is that from the machine that was in your office? 569 00:21:43,636 --> 00:21:45,221 Mm-hmm. 570 00:21:45,263 --> 00:21:46,389 I thought that was the incentive prize 571 00:21:46,431 --> 00:21:48,099 for the top sales person. 572 00:21:48,141 --> 00:21:50,143 Very easy to clean. 573 00:21:50,185 --> 00:21:52,062 Okay. 574 00:21:52,103 --> 00:21:53,730 Like he's gonna win anyway. 575 00:21:53,772 --> 00:21:55,523 [snickers] Right? 576 00:21:59,277 --> 00:22:01,196 Hey, Dwight. I need your stapler. 577 00:22:01,237 --> 00:22:03,740 It's in my purse. Oh, great, thanks. 578 00:22:08,953 --> 00:22:10,163 Did we get any mail? 579 00:22:10,205 --> 00:22:11,790 Yeah, I gave it to you. 580 00:22:11,831 --> 00:22:13,583 Yes, you did. Yes, you did. 581 00:22:13,625 --> 00:22:16,086 Just checking. Just checking, double checking. 582 00:22:16,127 --> 00:22:17,545 Checking on the check. 583 00:22:17,587 --> 00:22:21,591 Thoroughness is very important in an office, and-- 584 00:22:21,633 --> 00:22:22,717 So can I-- 585 00:22:22,759 --> 00:22:23,718 Yeah, yeah. 586 00:22:23,760 --> 00:22:24,969 Of course. 587 00:22:25,011 --> 00:22:26,304 Uh, Pam, one more thing. 588 00:22:26,346 --> 00:22:28,598 Um, how do girls your age feel about futons? 589 00:22:30,266 --> 00:22:31,267 (Jim) A futon? 590 00:22:31,309 --> 00:22:33,061 He's a grown man. 591 00:22:33,103 --> 00:22:34,604 That's what he said. 592 00:22:34,646 --> 00:22:36,231 That's sad. 593 00:22:36,272 --> 00:22:37,315 Or it's innovative. 594 00:22:37,357 --> 00:22:38,525 Well, you know, the futon 595 00:22:38,566 --> 00:22:41,611 is a bed and couch all rolled into one. 596 00:22:41,653 --> 00:22:42,612 What's up? 597 00:22:42,654 --> 00:22:44,739 Hi. 598 00:22:44,781 --> 00:22:46,741 Are you still mad at me? 599 00:22:46,783 --> 00:22:48,118 Roy... 600 00:22:48,159 --> 00:22:49,536 Come on. Cut it out. 601 00:22:49,577 --> 00:22:50,704 Come on, are you mad at me? 602 00:22:50,745 --> 00:22:52,038 Stop it! Are you still mad at me now? 603 00:22:52,080 --> 00:22:53,289 Cut it out. Are you mad at me now? 604 00:22:53,331 --> 00:22:54,582 [laughing] Stop! Huh? 605 00:22:54,624 --> 00:22:56,710 [laughing] Huh? Come on. 606 00:22:56,751 --> 00:22:58,628 Come on, Pammy. Stop, I can't breathe. 607 00:22:58,670 --> 00:23:00,255 I was just kidding. You know I didn't mean it. 608 00:23:00,296 --> 00:23:02,090 [Pam laughing] 609 00:23:02,132 --> 00:23:03,133 (Pam) Jim's a great guy. 610 00:23:03,174 --> 00:23:04,718 He's like a brother to me. 611 00:23:04,759 --> 00:23:06,678 We're, like, best friends in the office. 612 00:23:06,720 --> 00:23:09,931 And I really hope he finds someone. 613 00:23:09,973 --> 00:23:11,683 You seem to like to touch things. 614 00:23:11,725 --> 00:23:13,643 You should try the velvet. 615 00:23:13,685 --> 00:23:16,187 I don't like to necessarily touch things. 616 00:23:16,229 --> 00:23:19,274 I'm just-- I'm shopping. 617 00:23:19,315 --> 00:23:22,944 Oh, no, it's fine that you-- 618 00:23:22,986 --> 00:23:25,363 Here, what about the raspberry one? 619 00:23:25,405 --> 00:23:27,991 It's really, um, kind of festive. 620 00:23:28,033 --> 00:23:29,784 It's got a lot of personality. 621 00:23:29,826 --> 00:23:31,244 Hey, how's it going? Hey. 622 00:23:31,286 --> 00:23:33,246 Good, could I talk to you for a second, in private? 623 00:23:33,288 --> 00:23:35,081 I don't think so. I'm really busy. 624 00:23:35,123 --> 00:23:36,374 It'll just take a second. I can't. 625 00:23:36,416 --> 00:23:38,084 Just for a minute. Please? I really can't. 626 00:23:38,126 --> 00:23:39,586 I wanted to talk to you in private because 627 00:23:39,627 --> 00:23:42,255 I wanted to ask you out on a date. 628 00:23:43,506 --> 00:23:44,883 No. 629 00:23:52,307 --> 00:23:54,976 Okay, was that "no" to talking to me in private 630 00:23:55,018 --> 00:23:57,687 or was that "no" to the date? 631 00:23:57,729 --> 00:23:59,856 Both. 632 00:24:04,361 --> 00:24:06,654 What colors do you like? 633 00:24:06,696 --> 00:24:10,325 (Angela) Gray, dark gray, charcoal. 634 00:24:10,367 --> 00:24:12,452 Let me describe the perfect date. 635 00:24:12,494 --> 00:24:16,039 I take her out to a nice dinner. 636 00:24:16,081 --> 00:24:18,208 She looks amazing. 637 00:24:18,249 --> 00:24:20,126 Some guy tries to hit on her. 638 00:24:20,168 --> 00:24:22,504 [scoffs] Now he wants to fight. 639 00:24:22,545 --> 00:24:24,673 So I grab him, I throw him into a jukebox. 640 00:24:24,714 --> 00:24:27,133 Then the other ninja's got a knife--he comes at me. 641 00:24:27,175 --> 00:24:29,219 We grapple. I turn his knife on him. 642 00:24:29,260 --> 00:24:30,720 Blood on the dance floor. 643 00:24:30,762 --> 00:24:32,597 She's scared now. I take her home. 644 00:24:32,639 --> 00:24:34,182 I'm holding her in my arms. 645 00:24:34,224 --> 00:24:35,725 I reach in for a kiss. 646 00:24:35,767 --> 00:24:37,185 I hear something in the leaves. 647 00:24:37,227 --> 00:24:38,561 I flip her around. 648 00:24:38,603 --> 00:24:41,398 She gets a poison arrow right in her back. 649 00:24:41,439 --> 00:24:44,359 She was in on it the whole time. 650 00:24:44,401 --> 00:24:47,612 But I knew. 651 00:24:50,156 --> 00:24:51,533 Ryan... Yeah? 652 00:24:51,574 --> 00:24:52,992 Would you like to help me with a special project? 653 00:24:53,034 --> 00:24:54,869 I would love to. Well, all right. 654 00:24:56,705 --> 00:24:58,373 Okay, just throw out all the empties. 655 00:24:58,415 --> 00:24:59,624 You don't want to recycle them? 656 00:24:59,666 --> 00:25:01,710 Um...yes. 657 00:25:01,751 --> 00:25:05,296 Throw them away in the recycling bin. 658 00:25:05,338 --> 00:25:08,466 Do you want this? 659 00:25:08,508 --> 00:25:10,969 No. 660 00:25:11,011 --> 00:25:12,429 What about this bottle of power drink? 661 00:25:12,470 --> 00:25:13,680 Uh, what flavor? 662 00:25:13,722 --> 00:25:14,514 Blue. 663 00:25:14,556 --> 00:25:15,640 Blue's not a flavor. 664 00:25:15,682 --> 00:25:17,267 It says, "Flavor: Blue Blast." 665 00:25:17,308 --> 00:25:19,477 Oh, Blue Blast, yes. Put that in the trunk. 666 00:25:19,519 --> 00:25:21,730 And there should be an unopened Arctic Chill back there. 667 00:25:21,771 --> 00:25:23,898 I want that in the passenger's cup holder. 668 00:25:23,940 --> 00:25:25,859 Thank you. 669 00:25:34,284 --> 00:25:36,202 Hi. Hi. 670 00:25:36,244 --> 00:25:38,038 I'm Jim, by the way. I'm Katy. 671 00:25:38,079 --> 00:25:39,122 Hi, Katy, nice to meet you. 672 00:25:39,164 --> 00:25:40,415 You sit out there, don't you? I do. 673 00:25:40,457 --> 00:25:41,541 That's what I'm best known for. 674 00:25:41,583 --> 00:25:43,543 [laughs] Sitting out there. 675 00:25:43,585 --> 00:25:45,670 All right, let's talk about purses. 676 00:25:45,712 --> 00:25:46,963 Okay, um-- 677 00:25:47,005 --> 00:25:48,173 Katy, but, you know what? 678 00:25:48,214 --> 00:25:49,424 Don't try to sell me one. 679 00:25:49,466 --> 00:25:51,301 Okay, seriously. 680 00:25:51,343 --> 00:25:53,094 Because I'm just here to learn. 681 00:25:53,136 --> 00:25:54,471 Okay. 682 00:25:54,512 --> 00:25:56,514 So I know about most of these, but-- Okay. 683 00:25:57,682 --> 00:25:59,893 Whoa, stop! Whoa! That's my Drakkar Noir. 684 00:25:59,934 --> 00:26:01,603 No, this says Rite Aid "Night Swept." 685 00:26:01,644 --> 00:26:03,229 No, it is a perfect smell-alike. 686 00:26:03,271 --> 00:26:04,356 I'm not paying for the label. 687 00:26:04,397 --> 00:26:05,482 Right here, give it. 688 00:26:05,523 --> 00:26:06,775 It's empty. No, it's not. 689 00:26:06,816 --> 00:26:08,860 There's some in the straw. 690 00:26:12,030 --> 00:26:13,907 There, now. You may throw it out. 691 00:26:17,243 --> 00:26:18,870 Wow. 692 00:26:18,912 --> 00:26:20,789 How many Filet-O-Fishes do you eat? 693 00:26:20,830 --> 00:26:23,375 That's over several months, Ryan. 694 00:26:23,416 --> 00:26:26,211 Still... 695 00:26:26,252 --> 00:26:28,797 All right. That's looking good. 696 00:26:28,838 --> 00:26:31,591 Hey, um, Ryan, do you have any music I can borrow? 697 00:26:31,633 --> 00:26:32,926 What kind do you like? 698 00:26:32,967 --> 00:26:34,761 [grunts] You know, everything, really. 699 00:26:34,803 --> 00:26:36,930 I love it all. I love music. 700 00:26:36,971 --> 00:26:38,765 Do you like hip-hop? Do you like indie rock? 701 00:26:38,807 --> 00:26:40,475 Yes, I love both of those so much. 702 00:26:40,517 --> 00:26:42,060 A lot of 'em. Okay. 703 00:26:42,102 --> 00:26:43,353 Do you like The Strokes? 704 00:26:43,395 --> 00:26:44,604 Mm-hmm. I like 'em. 705 00:26:44,646 --> 00:26:45,772 Do you like The Hives? 706 00:26:45,814 --> 00:26:48,316 Yes, God. They're awesome. 707 00:26:48,358 --> 00:26:50,318 You like the Fleeples? The Glorps? 708 00:26:50,360 --> 00:26:51,569 Uh-huh. Yup. 709 00:26:51,611 --> 00:26:52,821 That last thing they did was great. 710 00:26:52,862 --> 00:26:54,864 Yeah, I had a feeling you'd like those. 711 00:26:54,906 --> 00:26:57,158 Cool, so maybe hook me up with some Fleeples 712 00:26:57,200 --> 00:26:58,368 and some hive. 713 00:26:58,410 --> 00:27:01,204 Absolutely. All right. 714 00:27:01,246 --> 00:27:02,872 This is gonna be good. 715 00:27:02,914 --> 00:27:03,915 What's up? 716 00:27:03,957 --> 00:27:05,333 I'm bored. 717 00:27:05,375 --> 00:27:07,877 Thank you for choosing me. 718 00:27:07,919 --> 00:27:09,004 No, I'm kidding. 719 00:27:09,045 --> 00:27:11,965 Um, so you got big plans this weekend? 720 00:27:12,007 --> 00:27:15,427 Uh...well, I think I'm gonna see Katy. 721 00:27:15,468 --> 00:27:16,886 Really? 722 00:27:16,928 --> 00:27:18,555 Yeah. 723 00:27:18,596 --> 00:27:20,223 What are you guys gonna do? 724 00:27:20,265 --> 00:27:22,142 Oh, man, I don't know. 725 00:27:22,183 --> 00:27:25,020 Uh, dinner, drinks, movie... 726 00:27:25,061 --> 00:27:26,563 matching tattoos. 727 00:27:27,731 --> 00:27:28,898 That's great. Big stuff. 728 00:27:28,940 --> 00:27:30,567 That's, mmm. Yeah. 729 00:27:30,608 --> 00:27:31,943 What are you doing? 730 00:27:31,985 --> 00:27:33,862 I was gonna say I think that, um... 731 00:27:33,903 --> 00:27:35,947 we're gonna help Roy's cousin move. 732 00:27:35,989 --> 00:27:38,408 Okay. 'Cause Roy's got a truck. 733 00:27:39,242 --> 00:27:40,493 That's cool. 734 00:27:40,535 --> 00:27:41,870 Uh-huh. 735 00:27:41,911 --> 00:27:43,038 Yes. 736 00:27:43,079 --> 00:27:44,581 That is cool. 737 00:27:44,622 --> 00:27:46,082 But I'll see you Monday, though, right? 738 00:27:46,124 --> 00:27:47,292 Great. 739 00:27:47,334 --> 00:27:48,918 Okay. Okay. I'm gonna head back. 740 00:27:48,960 --> 00:27:51,087 All right. 741 00:27:56,009 --> 00:27:58,553 (Michael) I think, in order to be a ladies' man, 742 00:27:58,595 --> 00:27:59,721 it's imperative that people 743 00:27:59,763 --> 00:28:01,556 don't know you're a ladies' man. 744 00:28:01,598 --> 00:28:04,142 So I kind of play that close to the chest. 745 00:28:04,184 --> 00:28:05,560 Ryan, where are my maps? 746 00:28:05,602 --> 00:28:06,728 We don't like to flaunt it. 747 00:28:06,770 --> 00:28:08,313 Where do I go to get maps? 748 00:28:08,355 --> 00:28:11,066 I mean, but I'm not-- it's not like I'm showing off. 749 00:28:11,107 --> 00:28:13,568 Ryan, what did you do to my computer? 750 00:28:13,610 --> 00:28:15,028 I'm supposed to have maps, right? 751 00:28:15,070 --> 00:28:16,237 But... 752 00:28:16,279 --> 00:28:17,781 Where? 753 00:28:17,822 --> 00:28:21,326 They see me as a big, powerful businessman here 754 00:28:21,368 --> 00:28:23,536 who kinda swaggers around a little bit. 755 00:28:23,578 --> 00:28:25,163 It's really not even fair. 756 00:28:27,040 --> 00:28:29,417 I don't know, what can I say? Women are attracted to power. 757 00:28:29,459 --> 00:28:31,920 And I think... 758 00:28:31,961 --> 00:28:34,798 other people have told me I have a very symmetrical face. 759 00:28:36,966 --> 00:28:38,385 [laughs] 760 00:28:38,426 --> 00:28:40,762 I don't know. I don't know. 761 00:28:40,804 --> 00:28:43,848 Maybe they're right. I don't know. 762 00:28:48,728 --> 00:28:51,398 Hi. Here, you can have this. 763 00:28:52,232 --> 00:28:55,485 It's a mini briefcase, but you can use it as a purse. 764 00:28:57,112 --> 00:28:59,155 Uh, thank you. 765 00:29:16,339 --> 00:29:17,799 (Michael) Sure you don't want me to help you with that? 766 00:29:17,841 --> 00:29:19,300 'Cause I can grab that, no problem. 767 00:29:19,342 --> 00:29:20,593 (Katy) Good night, it was nice to meet some of you. 768 00:29:20,635 --> 00:29:22,971 See ya later! Good night! 769 00:29:24,180 --> 00:29:25,598 Good night, Jim. 770 00:29:25,640 --> 00:29:27,225 Good night, Michael. 771 00:29:27,267 --> 00:29:28,935 Where you going? 772 00:29:28,977 --> 00:29:32,147 I don't know. Grab a drink, I think. 773 00:29:32,188 --> 00:29:34,482 With us? 774 00:29:34,524 --> 00:29:36,276 I, um, I probably should have told you, 775 00:29:36,317 --> 00:29:37,569 I don't need a ride now 776 00:29:37,610 --> 00:29:38,862 'cause Jim can take me home after. 777 00:29:38,903 --> 00:29:40,113 So you're off the hook. 778 00:29:40,155 --> 00:29:41,740 Okay, great, off the hook. Excellent. 779 00:29:41,781 --> 00:29:43,491 Okay, cool--all right. (Jim) I got this. 780 00:29:43,533 --> 00:29:46,911 Have fun. Don't drink and drive. 781 00:29:46,953 --> 00:29:47,996 Take it easy. 782 00:29:48,038 --> 00:29:48,997 Have a good night. You too. 783 00:29:49,039 --> 00:29:50,415 Have a good night! You got that? 784 00:29:50,457 --> 00:29:52,083 Oh, yeah. 785 00:29:52,125 --> 00:29:54,085 You sold a lot, so it's lighter. 786 00:29:54,127 --> 00:29:55,587 I bet. 787 00:29:55,628 --> 00:29:57,130 Well, here... 788 00:29:57,172 --> 00:29:59,507 [clears throat loudly] 789 00:29:59,549 --> 00:30:01,176 [engine turns] 790 00:30:01,217 --> 00:30:03,386 All right, now, I'm gonna warn you. 791 00:30:03,428 --> 00:30:04,971 Don't freak out, okay? Why? 792 00:30:05,013 --> 00:30:06,639 This is a really nice car. 793 00:30:06,681 --> 00:30:08,975 In case you haven't noticed, this is a Corolla, okay? 794 00:30:09,017 --> 00:30:11,019 It's a very nice car. 795 00:30:11,061 --> 00:30:12,729 So you're not gonna freak out? 796 00:30:12,771 --> 00:30:15,523 (Michael) Do I have a special someone? 797 00:30:15,565 --> 00:30:18,276 Uh, well, yeah, of course. 798 00:30:18,318 --> 00:30:19,361 A bunch of 'em. 799 00:30:19,402 --> 00:30:21,905 My employees. 800 00:30:21,946 --> 00:30:24,032 If I had to choose between a one-night stand 801 00:30:24,074 --> 00:30:26,159 with some stupid cow I pick up at a bar 802 00:30:26,201 --> 00:30:27,494 and these people, 803 00:30:27,535 --> 00:30:28,953 I'd pick them every time. 804 00:30:28,995 --> 00:30:32,874 Because with them, it is an every day stand. 805 00:30:32,916 --> 00:30:36,294 And I still know their names in the morning. 806 00:30:41,508 --> 00:30:42,926 Doris Roberts. 807 00:30:42,967 --> 00:30:44,010 Did you know, when she's in Phoenix, 808 00:30:44,052 --> 00:30:46,763 she likes to eat at Harter's? 809 00:30:46,805 --> 00:30:52,018 It's this, uh, it's, like, a barbeque place. 810 00:30:52,060 --> 00:30:55,522 She loves barbeque. So I didn't know that before. 811 00:30:55,563 --> 00:30:58,692 I read a profile of Corbin Bernsen. 812 00:30:58,733 --> 00:31:00,026 And that man-- 813 00:31:00,068 --> 00:31:03,154 did you know that he used to play Little League? 814 00:31:03,196 --> 00:31:05,365 Like, back--like-- 815 00:31:05,407 --> 00:31:08,201 see, I didn't-- I didn't see him as athletic. 816 00:31:08,243 --> 00:31:11,621 I read a profile of Red Buttons. 817 00:31:11,663 --> 00:31:13,540 Consummate entertainer. 818 00:31:13,581 --> 00:31:16,459 I read a profile of Bronson Pinchot, 819 00:31:16,501 --> 00:31:21,339 and his adventures in Tuscany-- it was great. 820 00:31:21,381 --> 00:31:24,634 It was charming, it was funny, um... 821 00:31:24,676 --> 00:31:26,928 But I learned something too.